We survived the eye appointment, but I had to cancel one of them because we didn't have both car seats in the car so Sunshine had to stay back with CuppaTea, the two year old. (I love inventing new names for my children as I write!)

Flash, the precocious eight year old has a bump on his retina and he never felt any problems with it, but the doctor was surprised by it's size. He'll see a specialist in a few weeks. No worries except how they have to remove it-- with an injection of steroids to the bump. He kept saying how I need to not miss the appointment and I was like, "Look, I am not into drama but could you elucidate on this? Should I call my prayer group at church?" He said definitely. I was thinking, "Cancer, my man could have cancer, good thing we come in every year. Chances of survival just went up if he has it because we've seen it." He said, "The shot won't be fun." (My son was out of the room.) I asked what religion he was and he said American Evangelical. His shadower that day was Mormon and I am Orthodox Christian. I joked with the shadower, "Dude, Evangelicals call their prayer group about hang nails!" We all laughed. Prayer group and bump on the back of the eye in the same sentence made me brace myself. Too funny.

Now this bump hasn't bugged my son at all but it must be fast growing because he had just seen the doctor last year at this time and the doctor saw nothing. He also needs glasses. I got a call from the school nurse, "Flash is crying about a bump on his eye? He also says he can't see so I gave him some Ibuprofen and want to let you know." Argh. The nurse was great as I told her that knowing for Flash creates 90% of the problem. I told her all the details and she laughed.

Several weeks ago Sunshine saw the dentist and he told me in front of her that she may need braces when she is 14. She got on my cell phone and called her sister, "The dentist says I need braces right away."

Mother Nature is nicer than my mother this week. All the trees and plants are starting to change color. The red in the trees and weeds is very striking. Berries are ready to be picked-- it is the best time of the year outside. The mushrooms are cooperating and coming up and let me pick them and paint them-- they are pretty.

Flies have come indoors-- Peaches runs around the house with a fly strip and gets them. I need to call her Froggy.

Tiger is making me laugh. Her guy friend is going to pharmacology school and he liked her and she liked him for years but the didn't date as he had a girl friend. Now they really dig each other but are staying friends and not dating as he has just left for college-- although they did date briefly. Very good choice. She told me about some of her spontaneous things she has done with him and while this is probably a transitory relationship for both of them, she has burned herself into his mind. She is funny and sweet and she will appear in his mind not infrequently. /what can I say? She is an artist like her mother and not afraid to be a little weird and fun at the same time.

At her age I felt pushed out of the house with no options other than marriage to the biggest dork I could find. (My ex spoke stilted English when he tried to sound sincere: "I prayed for a young lady. I try to be a gen'leman all the time." WTF. I thought that he loved me because he said I was pretty! I'd tire of him and get away only to have him throw himself at the alter of our Protestant church begging God to make me want him again. Others would come to me, "Tea! He LOVES you." Love is not obsession.

My parents had money but didn't want to spend it on me. I still needed to get out because they were just done with me. They told me I'd kill someone if I drove, my passion was languages but they said they'd not bail me out if I went overseas-- I think they just wanted me to have a boring existence and fade into nothingness. I had to get out and while my ex was and is a dork, I feel badly as he was my way out. At the time I was just confused.

Tiger is confident. She knows I have nothing but she still loves to come see us and feels loved. She doesn't need to latch on to anyone to feel safe. I am undoing what my parents did to me by doing right with my own kids.