You may remember what happened with my massage teacher. On the 19th he grabbed my nose in anger because I wasn't getting a routine and told me to listen to him. I said nothing at the time, had dinner with my husband, called a lawyer friend and spoke to that massage teacher, referred to as Mike in my blog but really called Thomas, and told him that in The Last Frontier what he did was considered assault and to never do that to me or anyone else again. He said that it was a learning technique that he used on students but said he'd not do it again to me. The next morning, in a non massage related technique called "Emotional Release" he did it again-- but in front of the class. I bitch slapped him and said he was done and that I'd sit down. The Tucker laughed and did it again. I gathered my stuff and left. I filed a report.
I went back only because my husband insisted and thought we could work something out with the Alaskan massage certification board. (It was a weekend. I had no one to call.)
When I was camping a few weeks ago, he called my husband's cell phone. He seemed nervous, would I please call him back. I sent him a nasty email and he responded that he'd been summoned to appear in court up here! LOL I said I'd check on it (when I had time and I have none and didn't plan to call him.) I didn't bother. It was out of my hands because assault is a felony up here and if the DA wanted to take it on, there was nothing I could do.
I recieved a letter from the DA's office saying that the case had been dropped but that the complaint was still on file and that there was an official record of it. Meanwhile, he sent me another note asking if I'd done anything about looking into it and I, knowing that it was closed, said nothing of it but mentioned that had he not yanked my nose THREE TIMES that he'd not be in his situation. By now he has gotten the letter, but it will either serve to make him think twice before he tries it again or serve to establish a pattern of behavior when someone else complains.
He hurt me, but it wasn't that he hurt me so much as that what he did was demeaning and that I'd told him not to. The guy was a flirt and works with young women as well as older ones like me and even older-- but he really has boundary issues. At no point did I give up my autonomy. What he did was almost eerie because the first time he did it, he appologized and sounded like an abusive boyfriend assuring me that he'd never do it again. The 2nd/3rd time he did it, his appology was the same, but he said that no one would care if I reported him and said that any publicity that I created would be good for his school. The guy is an MD by training and I can't help but wonder about him.